I write sincerely from the heart, sharing an experience that has troubled me deeply: the experience of having scammer-type friends. Many people talk about being scammed online, through emails or phone calls, but what about when the scammer is someone you consider a friend? This is my story, and perhaps it is also yours.
I have a friend who has made it a habit to ask me for money. At first, I did not think much of it. Friendship, after all, means helping one another. When he asked for RM20 or RM50, I willingly obliged. On some occasions, he even asked for RM100 or more. Out of kindness, and because I valued the friendship, I gave him what he asked. But over time, a thought began to grow in my mind: what if I was not the only one? If every month he asked for money from several of his friends, the amount he collected would be substantial. Suddenly, I realised that this was not simply borrowing—it was a pattern of manipulation. This is what I classify as a scammer friend.
The problem with scammer-type friends is that their deception is subtle. They do not snatch money from you directly, nor do they make wild threats. Instead, they appeal to your trust, to your kindness, and to the social bond of friendship. They exploit your sense of loyalty for their personal gain. And because the amounts they request are often small, like RM20 or RM50, you are tempted to believe it is harmless. But when you add it up, the figure becomes shocking. Imagine a person asking RM50 from ten friends every month. That is RM500 a month, more than some people earn in additional part-time work. And yet, the scammer does not work hard for this income; he simply manipulates his friendships.
What makes this worse is that such a friend is not a true friend at all. If you were in trouble, would he rush to help you? I doubt it. He is a friend not because he values your companionship, but because he values your wallet. Friendship, in its truest sense, should be built on trust, respect, and mutual support. A scammer friend destroys that trust and reduces the relationship to a financial transaction. Slowly, you begin to feel used, as though your generosity has been taken for granted.
I have begun to reflect seriously on this matter. Life is too short to carry people who only bring weight and worry. Friends should uplift us, not drain us. If we allow scammer-type friends to stay in our lives, we allow them to continue deceiving us. They make our lives more difficult, and in return we gain nothing but frustration. Even if the amount they ask for is “only” RM50 or RM100, the principle remains the same: it is not right. True friendship is not measured by money, but by sincerity.
One of the most revealing things about such people is how they present themselves. On social media, they look perfectly fine. They post photos of outings, entertainment, and luxuries. It makes me wonder: is the money I gave being used for enjoyment, while I felt guilty for not helping? Our sincere intention to support them is, in reality, turned into their opportunity for laughter. They mock our kindness, perhaps not openly, but in their hearts they feel victorious because they have managed to deceive us.
The saddest part is that when misfortune strikes us, scammer-type friends will not be there. When we are in hardship, they will vanish, because their connection to us was never genuine. They do not see us as friends but as resources. And when the resource dries up, so too does their loyalty.
I share this experience not with bitterness, but with hope. My hope is that others will recognise this pattern early and protect themselves. Friendship should never be reduced to exploitation. We must learn to identify those who are true companions and those who are merely playing the role of friends for personal benefit. As for me, I am beginning to distance myself from such people. It is not easy, but it is necessary. Life should be filled with relationships that bring growth, support, and happiness, not those that drain us of money, energy, and peace.
So, to anyone reading this: be cautious. Reflect on your friendships. Be generous, yes, but also wise. And if you discover a scammer-type friend in your life, do not be afraid to walk away. You deserve better.
与骗子型朋友相处的经历
我真诚地写下这段文字，分享一段令我深感困扰的经历：与骗子型朋友相处。许多人谈论过在网络上被骗的故事，例如通过电子邮件或电话诈骗，但如果骗子恰好是你认为的朋友呢？这是我的故事，也许也是你的故事。
我有一个朋友，他习惯性地向我借钱。起初，我并没有太在意。毕竟，朋友之间应该互相帮助。当他开口要RM20或RM50时，我乐意答应。有时候，他甚至要求RM100或更多。出于善意，也因为我珍惜这段友情，我把钱借给了他。然而，随着时间的推移，一个念头开始浮现在我脑海：如果我不是唯一一个呢？如果他每个月都向几位朋友开口，那么他得到的钱数将是相当可观的。突然间，我意识到，这并不只是单纯的借钱——而是一种长期的操纵。这正是我所谓的“骗子型朋友”。
骗子型朋友的问题在于，他们的欺骗非常隐蔽。他们不会直接抢你的钱，也不会发出疯狂的威胁。相反，他们利用你的信任、你的善良以及友情的纽带。他们把你对忠诚的重视当成了他们牟利的工具。而且，由于他们通常只要求RM20或RM50这样的小数目，你往往容易觉得“无伤大雅”。然而，当你把它们加在一起时，数字却令人震惊。想象一下，如果一个人每个月向十个朋友要RM50，他就能轻轻松松拿到RM500。这比有些人兼职赚到的还多。而这笔钱，他根本不需要努力工作，只要操纵友情就能得到。
更糟糕的是，这样的朋友根本算不上真正的朋友。如果你遇到困难，他会立刻来帮你吗？我怀疑。他之所以和你做朋友，并不是因为他珍惜你的陪伴，而是因为他看重你的钱包。真正的友情应该建立在信任、尊重和相互支持之上。骗子型朋友却摧毁了这种信任，把关系变成了一场金钱交易。渐渐地，你会开始觉得自己被利用，好像你的慷慨成了理所当然。
我开始认真思考这件事。人生短暂，我们不该让这种只会增加负担的人留在身边。真正的朋友应当给予我们力量，而不是不断消耗我们。如果我们允许骗子型朋友留在生活中，就是允许他们继续欺骗我们。他们让我们的生活更难，而我们却什么都得不到。即使他们只要“区区”RM50或RM100，原则问题依然存在：这是不对的。真正的友情从来不是用金钱来衡量的，而是用真诚。
这种人的一个显著特征就是他们的伪装。在社交媒体上，他们看起来一切安好。他们发出外出、娱乐和奢侈享受的照片。这让我不禁怀疑：我给出去的钱，是否被用来享乐？我们出于真心去帮助他们，但实际上，他们却因为成功欺骗我们而暗自发笑。
最令人难过的是，当我们遭遇不幸时，这类骗子型朋友是不会出现的。当我们陷入困境时，他们会消失，因为他们与我们的关系从来不是真诚的。他们不把我们当作朋友，而只是当作一种“资源”。当这个资源枯竭时，他们的忠诚也随之消失。
我分享这段经历，并不是出于怨恨，而是出于希望。希望别人能及早识破这种模式，保护自己。友情绝不应被降格为一种剥削。我们必须学会分辨谁是真正的朋友，谁只是为了个人利益而假装的朋友。至于我，我正在慢慢与这种人保持距离。这并不容易，但却是必要的。生活应该充满那些带来成长、支持和快乐的关系，而不是那些让我们在金钱、精力和心灵上被掏空的人。
所以，我想对每一位读到这段文字的人说：请谨慎。反思你的友情。要慷慨，但也要明智。如果你发现生活中存在骗子型朋友，不要害怕远离他们。你值得更好的。
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